Trips & Treats: $18.2mil SNAP'ed From Tax Payers While Box Jacked

Front line: San Antonio, TX; at 48 locations a state that remembers never surrendering is slowly succumbing to budgets clogged with the greasy, yellow desires of filthy poors —jacking off a box to get another dirty milkshake chalked w/unhealthful cookies. But this ole' poor-shaky-dirt-pipe is pouring across our Blessed Heartland and bankrupting us all; may we be spared from Nobummer.

Whether it's a break from dinner or a break from dreary life, leeches find a way. A program that allegedly lets poors buy hot food —like people, is one of two shocking ways the empire is being dragged down by Horatio No-goers tugging at our fashionable and patriotic bootstraps. KENS 5 has a statement from the very government jacking boxes that are clowning all the way to the bank with our tax dollars:

This is a great program for those customers who need financial assistance to help them feed their families, especially for some seniors and those who cannot cook for themselves.

Do not worry, your state of being confounded is understandable, because you are wise. These urchins chose their wretched lives, and Jesus himself said they would always be with us. Reagan agreed and Clinton ensured, so it's truly bipartisan and blessed by the Trinity. For every dollar leached, seeking convenience and possibly a minor pleasure —like inhuman demons, these cretins sin fivefold against our country and our God. It makes me so sick I have to throw this steak to my dog, and then he has to throw his chicken to the guinea pig.

When these semi-people aren't filling their high-carb-gluten-holes, these poor choices incarnate are spending an estimated $18.2 million on vacations, like a real person that might need to rest —or visit family.

Some may say that these almost-people aren't abusing the system in any major way —or that trafficking happens with about 1% of SNAP benefits, but we know that these parasites will drain the blood of our empire to fill their stomachs. We need to protect ourselves and our exceptional nation from a death by a thousand hungry scratches. The war on the poor is being fought, and we need to take sides. Take your side in the comments.